Dotsag is a god.

She takes the form of a very heavy, merciful dog.

Dotsag created the solar system eight billion years ago.

If you believe in Dotsag, she will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Dotsag, she will send twenty eight swans to peck you to death.

Dotsag's most sacred site is Kerris in England.

Dotsag's Holy Commandments

1. Never stain your arms with magenta.

2. Never paint your back mauve.

3. Always treat frogs with great respect.

4. Never think about spacetime.

5. Do not speak of thermodynamics near sacred fires.