Fitlagyogtarp is a god.

He takes the form of a large, caring swallow.

Fitlagyogtarp created life three hundred thousand years ago.

If you believe in Fitlagyogtarp, he will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Fitlagyogtarp, he will manifest in front of you.

Fitlagyogtarp's most sacred site is Aranganur in India.

Fitlagyogtarp's Holy Commandments

1. Always look after injured sheep.

2. Shun those given to sloth.

3. Always act with purity when addressing strangers.

4. Never write about bacteria.

5. Never wear kilts.