Sugxuckneg is a god.

He takes the form of a nine hundred metre long, compassionate donkey.

Sugxuckneg created an up quark five thousand years ago.

If you believe in Sugxuckneg, he will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Sugxuckneg, he will refuse to believe in you.

Sugxuckneg's most sacred site is Penhale in England.

Sugxuckneg's Holy Commandments

1. Never bounce near aardvarks.

2. Never pour water over plants.

3. Never speak aloud of secrets.

4. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

5. Never pray while filled with envy.