Wegcapnab is a god.

She takes the form of a galaxy-sized, humorless lion.

Wegcapnab created the Milkyway three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Wegcapnab, she will be surprised.

If you do not believe in Wegcapnab, she will send four elephants to rub you out.

Wegcapnab's most sacred site is Valdena in Italy.

Wegcapnab's Holy Commandments

1. Erect a large aluminium sculpture of Wegcapnab on top of all buildings.

2. Show mercy to disobedient children.

3. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

4. Retreat if nine hamsters approach from the north.

5. Do not trade with those who eat garlic.