Bepvagbonk is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely heavy, pitiless horse.

Bepvagbonk created a top quark nine thousand years ago.

If you believe in Bepvagbonk, she will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Bepvagbonk, she will have a low opinion of you.

Bepvagbonk's most sacred site is Grimme in Germany.

Bepvagbonk's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about the weak nuclear force.

2. Erect a giant silver sculpture of Bepvagbonk in the centre of the settlement.

3. Never feed lots of nuts to goats while wearing cyan scarves.

4. Run away from blue great tits, for they are unholy.

5. Tortoises are not to be trusted.