Sisfassab is a god.

He takes the form of a galaxy-sized, overgenerous hare.

Sisfassab created everything that exists seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Sisfassab, he will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Sisfassab, he will turn you into a worm.

Sisfassab's most sacred site is Minnigaff in Scotland.

Sisfassab's Holy Commandments

1. Always check lakes for frogs.

2. Always remove skirts before touching lead.

3. Do not drink from vessels made of titanium.

4. Do not speak sacred words in winter.

5. Do not place pineapples upon stone.