Fudjanquart is a god.

She takes the form of a chunky, ruthless centipede.

Fudjanquart created a top quark twelve years ago.

If you believe in Fudjanquart, she will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Fudjanquart, she will destroy your favourite dwarf planet.

Fudjanquart's most sacred site is Poloka in Botswana.

Fudjanquart's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

2. Never sit near rats.

3. Hide if four horses approach from the west.

4. Always maintain obedience during days of mourning.

5. Do not speak sacred words in summer.