Farcabtap is a god.

He takes the form of a five hundred metre long, kind tortoise.

Farcabtap created Africa seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Farcabtap, he will approve.

If you do not believe in Farcabtap, he will send you a sign.

Farcabtap's most sacred site is Mmankgodi in Botswana.

Farcabtap's Holy Commandments

1. Erect a large silicon sculpture of Farcabtap on top of all buildings.

2. Always take life seriously.

3. Never talk about fire.

4. Hide if five seals approach from the north.

5. Never talk about chromosomes.