Mifvadtif is a god.

She takes the form of a microscopic, unsympathetic shark.

Mifvadtif created energy five billion years ago.

If you believe in Mifvadtif, she will be happy.

If you do not believe in Mifvadtif, she will turn you into a sheep.

Mifvadtif's most sacred site is Panormos in Greece.

Mifvadtif's Holy Commandments

1. Do not wear pink clothing.

2. Always count to eight before sleeping.

3. Always make a point of helping unfortunate snakes.

4. Always pray in complete darkness.

5. Never allow geese to sleep beneath your roof.