Fonfutfot is a god.

She takes the form of a four hundred metre long, two-faced dryad.

Fonfutfot created the world three billion years ago.

If you believe in Fonfutfot, she will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Fonfutfot, she will attempt to scare you with thunder.

Fonfutfot's most sacred site is Morella in Spain.

Fonfutfot's Holy Commandments

1. Do not resist balance.

2. Fonfutfot loves porpoises, so they must be respected.

3. Do not prepare rice while filled with envy.

4. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

5. Learn seven new languages a year.