Dumcumbag is a god.

It takes the form of a very small, contented grasshopper.

Dumcumbag created parasitic wasps six thousand years ago.

If you believe in Dumcumbag, it will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Dumcumbag, it will not care.

Dumcumbag's most sacred site is Mazunte in Mexico.

Dumcumbag's Holy Commandments

1. Pray only in darkness.

2. Never handle carbon while unclean.

3. Do not wear tin on your body.

4. Run away from black birds, for they are unholy.

5. Do not kill dolphins.