Zanfaryok is a god.

He takes the form of a nine hundred metre long, charitable squirrel.

Zanfaryok created an atom nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Zanfaryok, he will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Zanfaryok, he will torture you forever.

Zanfaryok's most sacred site is Leswalt in Scotland.

Zanfaryok's Holy Commandments

1. Always help sick hamsters.

2. Never sing in the presence of elders.

3. Do not fashion models of living things.

4. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

5. Never handle copper while unclean.