Vagnakfub is a god.

It takes the form of a chunky, stupid snake.

Vagnakfub created everything that exists three billion years ago.

If you believe in Vagnakfub, it will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Vagnakfub, it will destroy your favourite dwarf planet.

Vagnakfub's most sacred site is Cuandixia in China.

Vagnakfub's Holy Commandments

1. Do not gather at walls at midday.

2. Do not count beyond nine during ceremonies.

3. Do not speak of solid mechanics near sacred fires.

4. Never run near horses.

5. Never prepare coconuts during winter.