Hamsismad is a god.

She takes the form of a minute, self-assured squirrel.

Hamsismad created bats six quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Hamsismad, she will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Hamsismad, she will destroy your favourite solar system.

Hamsismad's most sacred site is Avebury Stone Circle in England.

Hamsismad's Holy Commandments

1. Never touch ash while unclean.

2. Always look after injured nematodes.

3. Always cleanse water with water.

4. Never talk about evolution by means of natural selection.

5. Never discuss nucleic acids in public assemblies.