Gigtapyok is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely heavy, unjust bat.

Gigtapyok created the planet Venus seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Gigtapyok, he will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Gigtapyok, he will denounce you as a heretic.

Gigtapyok's most sacred site is Poloka in Botswana.

Gigtapyok's Holy Commandments

1. Heed all dreams.

2. Never feed onions to tapirs while wearing magenta hats.

3. Do not study archaea on holy days.

4. Never cross mountains at midnight.

5. Look mercifully on unfortunate ants.