Jipfenquartbap is a god.

She takes the form of a slender, contented camel.

Jipfenquartbap created the Sol system two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Jipfenquartbap, she will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Jipfenquartbap, she will ignore you.

Jipfenquartbap's most sacred site is Qantir in Egypt.

Jipfenquartbap's Holy Commandments

1. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

2. Never think about electromagnetism near goats while wearing indigo rings and balancing nine iron spheres on your neck.

3. Never mix strawberries with oil.

4. Never look in ponds.

5. Never talk about amino acids.