Tiflapmob is a god.

She takes the form of an exceedingly large, awe-inspiring crab.

Tiflapmob created the Whirlpool Galaxy six quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Tiflapmob, she will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Tiflapmob, she will turn you into an amoeba.

Tiflapmob's most sacred site is Cudillero in Spain.

Tiflapmob's Holy Commandments

1. Do not keep six squirrels in a large pit.

2. Always act with patience.

3. Never speak at dawn.

4. Remain prostrate during prayer.

5. Do not fashion sacred items from stone.