Karnutnell is a god.

He takes the form of a three hundred metre long, narcissistic porpoise.

Karnutnell created everything that exists two quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Karnutnell, he will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Karnutnell, he will turn you into a frog.

Karnutnell's most sacred site is Sarti in Greece.

Karnutnell's Holy Commandments

1. You must pray to Karnutnell five times a day.

2. Never speak at midday.

3. Do not cook food in pots.

4. Always act with purity when addressing strangers.

5. Always check lakes for frogs.