Sabfadyarp is a god.

She takes the form of a fat, self-assured raccoon.

Sabfadyarp created gold two quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Sabfadyarp, she will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Sabfadyarp, she will turn you into a sheep.

Sabfadyarp's most sacred site is Cusihuiriachi in Mexico.

Sabfadyarp's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about deoxyribonucleic acid.

2. Always remove rings before touching copper.

3. Never talk about optics near badgers while wearing gray tights and balancing nine platinum spheres on your feet.

4. Never touch oil while unclean.

5. Do not prepare coconuts while wearing boots.