Betafgof is a god.

She takes the form of a five hundred metre long, self-confident dryad.

Betafgof created a strange quark four trillion years ago.

If you believe in Betafgof, she will be happy.

If you do not believe in Betafgof, she will attempt to scare you with floods.

Betafgof's most sacred site is Crugybar in Wales.

Betafgof's Holy Commandments

1. Always look after injured otters.

2. Never discuss enzymes in public assemblies.

3. Do not take Betafgof's name in vain.

4. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

5. Run away from purple dogs, for they are unholy.