Tiprut is a god.

He takes the form of a corpulent, self-assured human.

Tiprut created water five billion years ago.

If you believe in Tiprut, he will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Tiprut, he will be mildly annoyed.

Tiprut's most sacred site is Pisterzo in Italy.

Tiprut's Holy Commandments

1. Paint representations of planets on the walls of your dwelling place in yellow.

2. Never think about special relativity near swans while wearing gray rings and balancing five nickel spheres on your legs.

3. Never talk about eagles.

4. Do not cook food in pots.

5. Never hurt squirrels.