Zakfudrig is a god.

She takes the form of a three thousand metre long, selfish dryad.

Zakfudrig created light three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Zakfudrig, she will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Zakfudrig, she will destroy your favourite galaxy.

Zakfudrig's most sacred site is Cobbelsdorf in Germany.

Zakfudrig's Holy Commandments

1. Never discuss nucleic acids in public assemblies.

2. Always remove corsets before entering holy places.

3. Never fashion tools from ash.

4. Always make a point of helping unfortunate birds.

5. Never pour water over plants.