Mipcissmis is a god.

She takes the form of an exceedingly fat, loving frog.

Mipcissmis created viruses eight billion years ago.

If you believe in Mipcissmis, she will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Mipcissmis, she will say rude things about you at parties.

Mipcissmis' most sacred site is Shengyou in China.

Mipcissmis' Holy Commandments

1. Do not dye your hair orange.

2. Always make sure there are no manatees in a room before entering it.

3. Do not fashion tools from gold.

4. Look mercifully on unfortunate voles.

5. Never wear stockings.