Jipmobflabtarpflow is a god.

She takes the form of a three hundred metre long, humane goose.

Jipmobflabtarpflow created an electron five billion years ago.

If you believe in Jipmobflabtarpflow, she will approve.

If you do not believe in Jipmobflabtarpflow, she will have an extremely low opinion of you.

Jipmobflabtarpflow's most sacred site is Troqueer in Scotland.

Jipmobflabtarpflow's Holy Commandments

1. Always help badgers.

2. Never hurt cats.

3. Never sprint near seals.

4. Erect three zinc sculptures of Jipmobflabtarpflow on top of important buildings.

5. Never talk about thermodynamics near rats while wearing indigo corsets.