Tombarnyokomt is a god.

He takes the form of a large, almighty warg.

Tombarnyokomt created an up quark seven billion years ago.

If you believe in Tombarnyokomt, he will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Tombarnyokomt, he will not care.

Tombarnyokomt's most sacred site is Dommerby in Denmark.

Tombarnyokomt's Holy Commandments

1. Never touch water while blessed.

2. Always cleanse your hands after touching gold.

3. Always face the north before speaking sacred words.

4. Never think about quantum mechanics.

5. Never think about optics near swans while wearing fawn corsets and balancing seven silicon spheres on your hands.