Matweglik is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely large, boastful walrus.

Matweglik created the Sol system two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Matweglik, it will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Matweglik, it will destroy your home planet.

Matweglik's most sacred site is Turckheim in France.

Matweglik's Holy Commandments

1. Never carve symbols of black holes into wood.

2. Do not wear blue clothing.

3. Do not contemplate ultrasonics during the night.

4. Never eat green fruit.

5. Do not utter prayers while touching gold.