Ortlikwot is a god.

He takes the form of an one thousand metre long, fast warg.

Ortlikwot created a strange quark seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Ortlikwot, he will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Ortlikwot, he will name a particularly small and pointless dust cloud after you.

Ortlikwot's most sacred site is Chettipet in India.

Ortlikwot's Holy Commandments

1. Do not count beyond four during ceremonies.

2. Always remove skirts before touching copper.

3. Always pray immersed in water.

4. Always pray in complete darkness.

5. Hide from fawn nematodes for they are unholy.