Sisjatlap is a god.

It takes the form of a very small, temperamental skunk.

Sisjatlap created the planet Saturn two billion years ago.

If you believe in Sisjatlap, it will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Sisjatlap, it will turn you into a mole.

Sisjatlap's most sacred site is Questenberg in Germany.

Sisjatlap's Holy Commandments

1. Do not eat aubergines.

2. Never travel toward the north during winter.

3. Do not take Sisjatlap's name in vain.

4. Always share cherries with strangers, but never with bats.

5. Always help tortoises in need.