Nurtfarcip is a god.

It takes the form of a three thousand metre long, ill-tempered finch.

Nurtfarcip created the planet Saturn six million years ago.

If you believe in Nurtfarcip, it will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Nurtfarcip, it will torture you forever.

Nurtfarcip's most sacred site is Troms in Norway.

Nurtfarcip's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat tomatoes.

2. Never feed figs to doves while wearing yellow hats.

3. Never hurt capybaras.

4. Draw representations of planets on the walls of your dwelling place.

5. Never carve symbols of galaxies into wood.