Ontlargpark Jadhonsas is a god.

She takes the form of a seven thousand metre long, pitiless crow.

Ontlargpark Jadhonsas created humankind three billion years ago.

If you believe in Ontlargpark Jadhonsas, she will celebrate by creating some galaxies.

If you do not believe in Ontlargpark Jadhonsas, she will curse you and those you beget for all time.

Ontlargpark Jadhonsas' most sacred site is Outchimedu in India.

Ontlargpark Jadhonsas' Holy Commandments

1. Never speak aloud of names.

2. Always help gulls in need.

3. Always help sick voles.

4. Always pray in complete darkness.

5. Never tolerate cries in holy places.