Yattdapflap is a god.

He takes the form of a seven hundred metre long, effective finch.

Yattdapflap created oxygen two million years ago.

If you believe in Yattdapflap, he will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Yattdapflap, he will ignore you.

Yattdapflap's most sacred site is Meidrim in Wales.

Yattdapflap's Holy Commandments

1. Retreat if four whales approach from the east.

2. Always wear cyan.

3. Never handle silicon while unclean.

4. Always take life seriously.

5. Always wear plain boots during rituals.