Stikjengad is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely heavy, fussy bee.

Stikjengad created the planet Saturn nine quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Stikjengad, she will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Stikjengad, she will make you grow a tail.

Stikjengad's most sacred site is Mazunte in Mexico.

Stikjengad's Holy Commandments

1. Run away from green geese, for they are unholy.

2. Remain standing during prayer.

3. Always share figs with strangers, but never with sharks.

4. Do not fashion sacred items from clay.

5. Never think about quantum mechanics near dogs while wearing pink boots and balancing nine tin spheres on your feet.