Timveenfoss is a god.

She takes the form of an exceedingly large, charitable wasp.

Timveenfoss created a bottom quark eight quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Timveenfoss, she will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Timveenfoss, she will destroy your home solar system.

Timveenfoss' most sacred site is Oitti in Finland.

Timveenfoss' Holy Commandments

1. Always check lakes for frogs.

2. Never eat strawberries on fasting days.

3. Retreat if six dolphins approach from the west.

4. Do not speak of electromagnetism near sacred fires.

5. Never speak aloud of names.