Yattzigcim is a god.

It takes the form of a six thousand metre long, narcissistic dryad.

Yattzigcim created an up quark eight thousand years ago.

If you believe in Yattzigcim, it will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Yattzigcim, it will destroy your favourite star.

Yattzigcim's most sacred site is Hoddom in Scotland.

Yattzigcim's Holy Commandments

1. Never gather nine tapirs near wells.

2. Remain standing during prayer.

3. Never talk about nebulae.

4. Never talk about aardvarks.

5. Paint representations of dwarf planets on the walls of your dwelling place in violet.