Vonfumteen is a god.

She takes the form of a heavy, sapient wyrm.

Vonfumteen created the Sun four billion years ago.

If you believe in Vonfumteen, she will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Vonfumteen, she will send minions to preach to you.

Vonfumteen's most sacred site is Corsock in Scotland.

Vonfumteen's Holy Commandments

1. Always pray immersed in water.

2. Never feed lots of nuts to capybaras while wearing blue jumpers.

3. Never proclaim while facing west.

4. Never tolerate songs in holy places.

5. Run away if six sharks approach from the north.