Karpinleg is a god.

She takes the form of a slender, prudent frog.

Karpinleg created humanity eight quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Karpinleg, she will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Karpinleg, she will not invite you to parties.

Karpinleg's most sacred site is Estedt in Germany.

Karpinleg's Holy Commandments

1. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

2. Never mark doors with brown.

3. Never think about bacteria.

4. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

5. Do not dye your hair turquoise.