Yarlbamfly is a god.

He takes the form of a seven hundred metre long, selfish meerkat.

Yarlbamfly created gold five billion years ago.

If you believe in Yarlbamfly, he will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Yarlbamfly, he will come to you in dreams.

Yarlbamfly's most sacred site is Embalam in India.

Yarlbamfly's Holy Commandments

1. Always face the west before speaking sacred words.

2. Never pour water over plants.

3. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

4. Never hurt sharks.

5. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.