Mankaptun is a god.

She takes the form of an exceedingly fat, overgenerous hyena.

Mankaptun created Mount Everest three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Mankaptun, she will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Mankaptun, she will turn you into a hamster.

Mankaptun's most sacred site is Bogogobo in Botswana.

Mankaptun's Holy Commandments

1. Erect a giant nickel sculpture of Mankaptun in the centre of the settlement.

2. Never think about fluid mechanics near moths while wearing violet scarves and balancing nine silver spheres on your arms.

3. Hide if three ants approach from the south.

4. Always cleanse water with water.

5. Do not cook food in pots.