Bestwegpak is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely heavy, selfish raccoon.

Bestwegpak created the Sol system two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Bestwegpak, she will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Bestwegpak, she will not invite you to parties.

Bestwegpak's most sacred site is Ronda in Spain.

Bestwegpak's Holy Commandments

1. Never feed peas to shrews while wearing gray kilts.

2. Your children must be taught to worship Bestwegpak.

3. Pray only in shadows.

4. Paint representations of nebulae on the walls of your dwelling place in white.

5. Never play with disobedient children.