Jadtinzak is a god.

He takes the form of a planet-sized, irritating duck.

Jadtinzak created the Black Eye Galaxy three hundred thousand years ago.

If you believe in Jadtinzak, he will celebrate by creating some planets.

If you do not believe in Jadtinzak, he will curse you and those you beget for twenty six billion years.

Jadtinzak's most sacred site is Bokaa in Botswana.

Jadtinzak's Holy Commandments

1. Do not speak sacred words in summer.

2. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

3. Put Jadtinzak first in all things.

4. You must pray to Jadtinzak seven times a day.

5. Always share onions with strangers, but never with horses.