Misgonnurlpaglatmat is a god.

She takes the form of a five thousand metre long, thoughtless mink.

Misgonnurlpaglatmat created parasitic wasps nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Misgonnurlpaglatmat, she will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Misgonnurlpaglatmat, she will turn you into a small brown duck.

Misgonnurlpaglatmat's most sacred site is Polagam in India.

Misgonnurlpaglatmat's Holy Commandments

1. Never record secrets.

2. Never write about ribonucleic acid.

3. Always share beans with strangers, but never with squirrels.

4. Always wear red.

5. Heed all visions.