Genbigfatdub is a god.

It takes the form of a four thousand metre long, stupid cow.

Genbigfatdub created the solar system two quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Genbigfatdub, it will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Genbigfatdub, it will boil you in a big pot.

Genbigfatdub's most sacred site is Gorslas in Wales.

Genbigfatdub's Holy Commandments

1. Never chant while facing east.

2. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

3. Never mark doors with violet.

4. Never skip in the presence of elders.

5. Show mercy to disobedient children.