Dancipbesslen is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely large, uncaring mink.

Dancipbesslen created the planet Saturn twelve years ago.

If you believe in Dancipbesslen, he will be happy.

If you do not believe in Dancipbesslen, he will destroy your home solar system.

Dancipbesslen's most sacred site is Krina in Germany.

Dancipbesslen's Holy Commandments

1. Always help goats in need.

2. Always make sure there are no frogs in a room before entering it.

3. Never point your arms toward the south during prayer.

4. Do not consume limes at dawn.

5. Draw representations of black holes on the walls of your dwelling place.