Jenkadzenjabqueegmon is a god.

She takes the form of a nine thousand metre long, loving porpoise.

Jenkadzenjabqueegmon created the planet Earth six thousand years ago.

If you believe in Jenkadzenjabqueegmon, she will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Jenkadzenjabqueegmon, she will turn you into an amoeba.

Jenkadzenjabqueegmon's most sacred site is Quellendorf in Germany.

Jenkadzenjabqueegmon's Holy Commandments

1. Do not dye your hair magenta.

2. Never point your head toward the east during prayer.

3. Worship no other gods but Jenkadzenjabqueegmon.

4. Never adorn your back with purple markings.

5. Do not place parsnips upon stone.