Diddavfedjig is a god.

It takes the form of a gargantuan, all-knowing seal.

Diddavfedjig created humanity six trillion years ago.

If you believe in Diddavfedjig, it will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Diddavfedjig, it will curse you and those you beget for fifty two trillion years.

Diddavfedjig's most sacred site is Dornbock in Germany.

Diddavfedjig's Holy Commandments

1. Put Diddavfedjig first in all things.

2. Never tolerate whispers in holy places.

3. Do not stand on grass.

4. Never talk about dolphins.

5. Never chant in holy places.