Gomgetwig is a god.

She takes the form of a very thin, witty gerbil.

Gomgetwig created the cosmos nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Gomgetwig, she will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Gomgetwig, she will say rude things about you at parties.

Gomgetwig's most sacred site is Saint-Sauvan in France.

Gomgetwig's Holy Commandments

1. Do not fashion models of living things.

2. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

3. Never think about special relativity near mites while wearing magenta skirts and balancing seven aluminium spheres on your feet.

4. Pray towards the north.

5. Gomgetwig loves cats, so they must be honoured.