Queegsanpag is a god.

It takes the form of a small, blissful jaguar.

Queegsanpag created the Andromeda Galaxy nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Queegsanpag, it will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Queegsanpag, it will try to impress you with trees.

Queegsanpag's most sacred site is Dimson in England.

Queegsanpag's Holy Commandments

1. Never paint your legs white.

2. Never talk about fire.

3. Queegsanpag loves turtles, so they must be honoured.

4. Never discuss ribonucleic acid in public assemblies.

5. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.