Bogbustaf Flybuddab is a god.

It takes the form of an exceedingly large, unfair aardvark.

Bogbustaf Flybuddab created an electron nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Bogbustaf Flybuddab, it will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Bogbustaf Flybuddab, it will send four elephants to rub you out.

Bogbustaf Flybuddab's most sacred site is Hoddom in Scotland.

Bogbustaf Flybuddab's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about black holes.

2. Fast once a month.

3. Heed all signs.

4. Never gather five shrews in one place.

5. Never think about eukaryotes.