Hotwodlabmothonwigpomzak is a god.

She takes the form of a rotund, tranquil ant.

Hotwodlabmothonwigpomzak created a photon eight billion years ago.

If you believe in Hotwodlabmothonwigpomzak, she will make you lucky.

If you do not believe in Hotwodlabmothonwigpomzak, she will have a low opinion of you.

Hotwodlabmothonwigpomzak's most sacred site is Makopong in Botswana.

Hotwodlabmothonwigpomzak's Holy Commandments

1. Never feed lots of corn to porpoises while wearing purple shorts.

2. Erect a giant nickel sculpture of Hotwodlabmothonwigpomzak in the centre of the settlement.

3. Look mercifully on unfortunate horses.

4. Never touch blood while unclean.

5. Never mark doors with violet.