Vanyokstrag is a god.

She takes the form of an exceedingly large, omniscient rat.

Vanyokstrag created a charm quark eight million years ago.

If you believe in Vanyokstrag, she will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Vanyokstrag, she will send you a sign.

Vanyokstrag's most sacred site is Yerakini in Greece.

Vanyokstrag's Holy Commandments

1. Put Vanyokstrag first in all things.

2. Do not stand on grass.

3. Never discuss photosynthesis in public assemblies.

4. Do not keep nine dogs in a large pit.

5. Feed all hungry goats.